Funny Quotes 2013: Funny Quotes About Work

Funny Quotes About Work Definition

Source(google.com.pk)
Everyone says that loves hurts, but that's not true. Loneliness hurts. Rejection hurts. Losing someone hurts. Everyone confuse these things with love but reality, love is the only thing in this world that covers up all the pain and makes us feel wonderful again.
When two people are meant for each other, no time is too long, no distance is too far, no one can ever tear them apart.
We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly - Sam Keen, from To Love and Be Loved.
Love is a language spoken by everyone but understood only by the heart.
Beginnings are usually scary and endings are usually sad, but it's everything in between that makes it all worth living.
Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was beyond my control.
Falling in love is like jumping off a really tall building. Your brain tells you it is not a good idea, but your heart tells you, you can fly.
What is love? In math: an equation; in history: a war; in chemistry: a reaction; in art: a heart; in me: YOU.
You really love him, don't you? a simple psychological question, no name was mentioned but suddenly someone came into your mind
I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. - Marilyn Monroe.
You don't love someone because they're perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they're not. - Jodi Picoult.
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr. Seuss.
You've got to dance like there's nobody watching. Love like you'll never be hurt. Sing like there's nobody listening. And live like it's heaven on earth. - William W. Purkey.
It takes a minute to have a crush on someone an hour to like someone and a day to love someone but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.
According to Greek mythology humans were originally created with 4 arms 4 legs and a head with 2 faces. Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other halves.
These quotes come from a variety of sources, and due to my laxness, I haven't bothered to document their origins (nor am I likely to start now). If you'd like to find out who said what when, there are several on-line sources, as well as print sources (i.e., Bartlett's) for that sort of thing. Otherwise, you'll just have to take my word for it that I didn't just make them up. Remember: this is the web, not a refereed literary journal or the New York Times. I don't have to verify my sources.
To view the quotes, either scroll down the page, or if you're looking for a quote by someone in particular, click on the first letter of his or her last name.
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
- Douglas Adams
There are two kinds of writer: those that make you think, and those that make you wonder.
- Brian Aldiss
A writer should say to himself, not, How can I get more money?, but How can I reach more readers (without lowering standards)?
- Brian Aldiss
The story...must be a conflict, and specifically, a conflict between the forces of good and evil within a single person.
- Maxwell Anderson
When a man publishes a book, there are so many stupid things said that he declares he'll never do it again. The praise is almost always worse than the criticism.
- Sherwood Anderson
You know how it is in the kid's book world; it's just bunny eat bunny.
- Anonymous
Character gives us qualities, but it is in actions - what we do - that we are happy or the reverse....All human happiness and misery take the form of action.
- Aristotle
Have something to say, and say it as clearly as you can. That is the only secret.
- Matthew Arnold
It is the writer who might catch the imagination of young people, and plant a seed that will flower and come to fruition.
- Isaac Asimov
No one suggests that writing about science will turn the entire world into a model of judgment and creative thought. It will be enough if they spread the knowledge as widely as possible.
- Isaac Asimov
Rejection slips, or form letters, however tactfully phrased, are lacerations of the soul, if not quite inventions of the devil - but there is no way around them.
- Isaac Asimov
To most readers the word 'fiction' is an utter fraud. They are entirely convinced that each character has an exact counterpart in real life and that any small discrepancy with that counterpart is a simple error on the author's part. Consequently, they are totally at a loss if anything essential is altered. Make Abraham Lincoln a dentist, put the Gettysburg Address on his tongue, and nobody will recognize it.
- Louis Auchincloss
The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this notion rested solely on my suspicion that I would never be fit for real work, and that writing didn't require any.
- Russell Baker
Unless a writer is extremely old when he dies, in which case he has probably become a neglected institution, his death must always be seen as untimely. This is because a real writer is always shifting and changing and searching. The world has many labels for him, of which the most treacherous is the label of Success.
- James Baldwin
If the artist does not fling himself, without reflecting, into his work, as Curtis flung himself into the yawning gulf, as the soldier flings himself into the enemy's trenches, and if, once in this crater, he does not work like a miner on whom the walls of his gallery have fallen in; if he contemplates difficulties instead of overcoming them one by one...he is simply looking on at the suicide of his own talent.
- Honore de Balzac
It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.
- Robert Benchley
Why do writers write? Because it isn't there.
- Thomas Berger
He was such a bad writer, they revoked his poetic license.
- Milton Berle
PROOF-READER, n. A malefactor who atones for making your writing nonsense by permitting the compositor to make it unintelligible.
- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary
And as to experience--well, think how little some good poets have had, or how much some bad ones have.
- Elizabeth Bishop
Being a poet is one of the unhealthier jobs--no regular hours, so many temptations!
- Elizabeth Bishop
A best seller was a book which somehow sold well simply because it was selling well.
- S. Boorstein
In science there is a dictum: don't add an experiment to an experiment. Don't make things unnecessarily complicated. In writing fiction, the more fantastic the tale, the plainer the prose should be. Don't ask your readers to admire your words when you want them to believe your story.
- Ben Bova
There is probably no hell for authors in the next world -- they suffer so much from critics and publishers in this.
- C. N. Bovee
Bring all your intelligence to bear on your beginning.
- Elizabeth Bowen
Any man who keeps working is not a failure. He may not be a great writer, but if he applies the old-fashioned virtues of hard, constant labor, he'll eventually make some kind of career for himself as writer.
- Ray Bradbury
First, find out what your hero wants, then just follow him!
- Ray Bradbury
Beware of self-indulgence. The romance surrounding the writing profession carries several myths: that one must suffer in order to be creative; that one must be cantankerous and objectionable in order to be bright; that ego is paramount over skill; that one can rise to a level from which one can tell the reader to go to hell. These myths, if believed, can ruin you.
If you believe you can make a living as a writer, you already have enough ego.
- David Brin
If you have other things in your life -- family, friends, good productive day work -- these can interact with your writing and the sum will be all the richer.
- David Brin
The writer is important only by dint of the territory he colonizes.
- Van Wyck Brooks
Either a writer doesn't want to talk about his work, or he talks about it more than you want.
- Anatole Broyard
Sex almost always disappoints me in novels. Everything can be said or done now, and that's what I often find: everything, a feeling of generality or dispersal. But in my experience, true sex is so particular, so peculiar to the person who yearns for it. Only he or she, and no one else, would desire so very much that very person under those circumstances. In fiction, I miss that sense of terrific specificity.
- Anatole Broyard
Don't explain why it works; explain how you use it.
- Steven Brust
Literature is all, or mostly, about sex.
- Anthony Burgess
Style has always been in my mind the author's Self, the creative expression of that Self.
- Whit Burnett
I have been successful probably because I have always realized that I knew nothing about writing and have merely tried to tell an interesting story entertainingly.
- Edgar Rice Burroughs
If you write one story, it may be bad; if you write a hundred, you have the odds in your favor.
- Edgar Rice Burroughs
    Break; twist.
    The causing of motion against a resisting force, measured by the product of the force into the component of the motion resolved along the direction of the force.
    Ore before it is dressed.
    Exertion of strength or faculties; physical or intellectual effort directed to an end; industrial activity; toil; employment; sometimes, specifically, physically labor.
    The matter on which one is at work; that upon which one spends labor; material for working upon; subject of exertion; the thing occupying one; business; duty; as, to take up one's work; to drop one's work.
    That which is produced as the result of labor; anything accomplished by exertion or toil; product; performance; fabric; manufacture; in a more general sense, act, deed, service, effect, result, achievement, feat.
    Specifically: (a) That which is produced by mental labor; a composition; a book; as, a work, or the works, of Addison. (b) Flowers, figures, or the like, wrought with the needle; embroidery.
    Structures in civil, military, or naval engineering, as docks, bridges, embankments, trenches, fortifications, and the like; also, the structures and grounds of a manufacturing establishment; as, iron works; locomotive works; gas works.
    The moving parts of a mechanism; as, the works of a watch.
    Manner of working; management; treatment; as, unskillful work spoiled the effect.
    The causing of motion against a resisting force. The amount of work is proportioned to, and is measured by, the product of the force into the amount of motion along the direction of the force. See Conservation of energy, under Conservation, Unit of work, under Unit, also Foot pound, Horse power, Poundal, and Erg.
    Ore before it is dressed.
    Performance of moral duties; righteous conduct.
    To exert one's self for a purpose; to put forth effort for the attainment of an object; to labor; to be engaged in the performance of a task, a duty, or the like.
    Hence, in a general sense, to operate; to act; to perform; as, a machine works well.
    Hence, figuratively, to be effective; to have effect or influence; to conduce.
    To carry on business; to be engaged or employed customarily; to perform the part of a laborer; to labor; to toil.
    To be in a state of severe exertion, or as if in such a state; to be tossed or agitated; to move heavily; to strain; to labor; as, a ship works in a heavy sea.
    To make one's way slowly and with difficulty; to move or penetrate laboriously; to proceed with effort; -- with a following preposition, as down, out, into, up, through, and the like; as, scheme works out by degrees; to work into the earth.
    To ferment, as a liquid.
    To act or operate on the stomach and bowels, as a cathartic.
    To labor or operate upon; to give exertion and effort to; to prepare for use, or to utilize, by labor.
    To produce or form by labor; to bring forth by exertion or toil; to accomplish; to originate; to effect; as, to work wood or iron into a form desired, or into a utensil; to work cotton or wool into cloth.
    To produce by slow degrees, or as if laboriously; to bring gradually into any state by action or motion.
    To influence by acting upon; to prevail upon; to manage; to lead.
    To form with a needle and thread or yarn; especially, to embroider; as, to work muslin.
    To set in motion or action; to direct the action of; to keep at work; to govern; to manage; as, to work a machine.
    To cause to ferment, as liquor.